04.08.09

Recovery Testimonial: Painkiller Predicament

Posted in Get Help, Painkillers, Prescription Drugs, Recovery, Recovery Testimonials at 5:00 am by inrecovery

The NA Blog would like to share this moving and enlightening testimonial written by a recovering addict about their struggle with a prescription drug addiction and the wonders that the internet plays in 21st Century recovery. Please keep in mind that the author’s identity has been kept anonymous for the sake of maintaining the basic premise within NA of anonymity.

Painkiller Predicament

As I sit down to write this, I still can’t believe that this is my story. My name is Nicole and I was a competitive bicycle racer for many years. I wasn’t pro or anything but I loved riding my bike fast. I was physically fit, never a smoker or big drinker and my only real addiction was clipping in and riding. One morning I was out on a training run and a car turned left in front of me leaving me no time to stop. I flew over the hood and landed flat on my back. The first thing I did was wiggle my fingers and toes and thank the lord they all moved. I knew I wasn’t paralyzed but I couldn’t stand up or move. After the ambulance, the lawsuit and countless hours of physical therapy I found myself addicted to pain medication.

I don’t have an ugly story of addiction to tell. I never woke up in a strange place covered in vomit. I never sold all of my possessions or lost the deed to my house. But I was an addict nonetheless. I couldn’t get off the painkillers. I kept upping my dosage all on my own. I just didn’t think I was ‘one of those people’, an addict. It was easy for me to rationalize that addicts are all homeless people or that if I was able to go to work I must be fine. However the pills affected my personality, my relationships, my habits and all the other parts of my life. Finally I found help through a website filled with real honest people who had experiences similar to my own. I learned that addiction is a disease and it can affect ANYBODY. Nobody is ‘too good’ to be addicted.

I was taking an ungodly number of pills to kill the pain of depression, my backache and to keep me out of withdrawal for not taking enough pills! I was barely managing to keep my job and I knew I needed help. I was a shell of the athletic and outgoing person that I was. I knew I needed help and enrolling in rehab saved my life.

I want to share my story because there are millions of Americans out there addicted to prescription drugs. My addiction snuck up on me after a devastating accident and my growing addiction to the meds just made everything worse. I was a working professional woman with a good head on her shoulders. I was an athlete and proud of my body but my body took control of me for a while. I needed help and I asked for it. Please, if my story strikes a chord with you, please do not be afraid to ask for help. There are people out there waiting to help you become whole again.

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